go, mordecai!

i'm sure that rooster is the devil.

Sat, 29 Dec 2007 04:26:28 GMT

Five things that 2007 taught me:
1. i want a career in improv.
2. britney spears is going to die soon.
3. i'm really great at long-distance relationships.
4. republican senators love glory holes.
5. sometimes best friends make the best boyfriends.

Five personally significant events of 2007:
1. getting chosen to be the director of jm7.
2. getting nominated for a kevin kline award.
3. being cast as amanda wingfield in "glass menagerie."
4. being dumped by tim.
5. going to new york city.

Five things I want to do in 2008:
1. graduate.
2. figure out what to do with my life.
3. figure out where i am living.
4. get a job.
5. go to serbia for eurovision.

Five people I'd like to know better in 2008:
1. andy.
2. amber.
3. nick.
4. todd.
5. rachel.

1. What did you do in 2007 that you'd never done before?
i went to the kevin kline awards.

2. Did you keep your new years' resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
i don't make new years' resolutions.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
no. ew.

4. Did anyone close to you die?
a former teacher.

5. What countries did you visit?
just the good old us of a.

6. What would you like to have in 2008 that you lacked in 2007?
a nice boy who likes me.

7. What date from 2007 will remain etched upon your memory?
november 22.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
"glass menagerie."

9. What was your biggest failure?
letting tim get me down.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
nothing major.

11. What was the best thing you bought?
my betsey johnson dress.

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
jp's.

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
tim's.

14. Where did most of your money go?
clothes, probably.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
seeing upright citizen's brigade in chicago, going to new york city.

16. What song will always remind you of 2007?
"flying the flag" by scooch, "wuthering heights" by kate bush, "1234" by feist, "panama" by van halen.

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:

i. Happier or sadder?
happier.

ii. Thinner or fatter?
thinner.

iii. Richer or poorer?
richer.

18. What do you wish you'd done more of?
traveling. always more traveling.

19. What do you wish you'd done less of?
dating tim.

20. How did you spend Christmas?
with my little family, cooking and eating and opening presents.

21. How did you spend New Years?
last year, i was at durkin's house, with ali in the basement, vomiting furiously. this year, i'll be at ali's apartment with jp, katy, nolan, and andy. and maybe some other people. maybe durkin will come by and projectile vomit.

22. Did you fall in love in 2007?
yes.

23. How many one-night stands?
none.

24. What was your favorite TV program?
"30 rock."

25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
no, i like more people now than last year. except for tim. i like tim a lot less.

26. What was the best book you read?
"i like you: hospitality under the influence" by amy sedaris.

27. What was your greatest musical discovery?
kate bush. absolutely.

28. What did you want and get?
a nice boy.

29. What did you want and not get?
that new honda that emits only pure water vapor.

30. What was your favorite film of this year?
"the darjeeling limited."

31. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
i turned 22. i went to class and rehearsal, then i went to the loft and got shitfaced. marcia and jeanne bought me drinks at digger's, and jp drove me home while i puked out the window. yay.

32. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
i wish my sister wasn't such a douche sometimes.

33. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2007?
getting it together.

34. What kept you sane?
my friends, streaming episodes of "30 rock" on nbc.com.

35. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
tina fey.

36. What political issue stirred you the most?
<3 larry craig <3.

37. Who did you miss?
my family, tim, jp, brynn, alex.

38. Who was the best new person you met?
nick.

39. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2007:
in order for a relationship to work, both people need to make an effort.

40. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.
"it's britney, bitch."

happy new year, everyone!

welcome to beautiful syracuse international airport.

Tue, 20 Nov 2007 15:29:40 GMT

happy almost thanksgiving.
i'm in syracuse, new york, waiting for tim to come pick me up in six hours.

1. The age you will be on your next birthday.

2. A place to which you’d like to travel.

3. Your favorite place.

4. Your favorite object.

5. Your favorite food.

6. Your favorite animal.

7. Your favorite color.

8. The city in which you were born.

9. The name of a past pet.

10. Your nickname/screen name.

11. Your first name.

12. A bad habit of yours.

13. Your first job.

14. Your major in college.

i should be memorizing.

Mon, 14 May 2007 20:13:32 GMT

NAME:

WHAT YOU LOOK LIKE:

WHERE DO YOU LIVE:

YOUR BEST FRIENDS:

YOUR PETS:

YOUR SIGNIFICANT OTHER:

FAVORITE MUSIC:

FAVORITE BOOKS:

FAVORITE MOVIES:

FAVORITE SCENT:

FEMALE CELEBRITIES YOU'D FUCK:

MALE CELEBRITIES YOU'D FUCK:

FAVORITE TV SHOWS:

FAVORITE CARTOON CHARACTER:

ZODIAC SIGN:

FAVORITE FOOD:

HOBBIES/INTERESTS:

yay.

chili this spicy can only be made when love is absent.

Fri, 23 Mar 2007 07:18:56 GMT

i'm going to the kevin kline awards on monday. it's the st. louis regional theatre award show. there will probably be a red carpet, and it's kind of a big deal because metamorphoses is nominated for six awards, including best ensemble cast. i have two dresses but can't make up my mind. please leave me a comment with your opinions? thank you.

1. brown strapless a-line dress. this fabric is brown with a small green iridescent geometric pattern. i'd wear it with gold accessories and probably gold shoes. it was kind of expensive, which is a definite downside to it, but it looks sophisticated and shows off my hot bod.

2. blue babydoll halter dress. it's betsey johnson, but i got it super on-sale because i'm amazing. it's about half the price of the brown dress, which is a definite positive. i'd wear it with the black shoes and silver jewelery like in the picture. this fabric is a dark blue silk satin with small black floral embroidery.

my gay boyfriend.

Sun, 11 Feb 2007 23:51:49 GMT

jp's in london this semester and i miss him so much it makes me vomit. this is the second conversation we've had since he's been gone.

notanaddict4205: hahahahhaa that is so fucking awkward. slash amazing.
notanaddict42-5: and i mean, let's be honest. its getting pretty hairy. GET IT???????
i got poped: before we fall asleep he says "this isn't going to be weird, is it?"
i got poped: which is exactly the kind of sweet romantic musing i like to hear before i drift off to sleep.
notanaddict4205: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
notanaddict4205: HEY DONIELLO.
notanaddict4205: HEY OLD TIMER
notanaddict4205: jeeezchrist.
i got poped: what do you think?
notanaddict4205: you wanna get BANGED like "debbie" debbie.
notanaddict4205: either way, it will be awkward and worth talking about over live radio. RIGHT?
i got poped: aaaaaaahahahahahahaha.
i got poped: GOD YOU'RE GOOD.
notanaddict4205: so i saw the fucking SCARIEST play i have ever seen.
notanaddict4205: the woman in black
notanaddict4205: i want to direct it in the phoenix next fall.
notanaddict4205: and yes, don't worry. i'm coming home to your loving arms.
i got poped: THANK GOD.
notanaddict4205: also, also, also, fucking... anna nicole smith.
i got poped: also seriously anna nicole smith
i got poped: i can't believe it
i got poped: i mean, i CAN believe it
i got poped: but seriously
i got poped: WE HARDLY KNEW YEE
notanaddict4205: NO LIKE.... fucking. i turned on the tv randomly, and just.... shat my pants. and was like WHY AM I NOT IN BEAUTIFUL BLOOMINGTON SLASH NORMAL SO THAT I CAN TALK ABOUT THIS SHIT ON THE AIR? JEEEZCHRIIIIIIIIIIST1
notanaddict4205: ok i love you
notanaddict4205: but i am going to go to the bar now and try and get banged
notanaddict4205: and fuck the pain away

jp's coming back. i'm going to see him again. thank you.

r.i.p.

Thu, 08 Feb 2007 22:58:33 GMT

anna nicole smith
1967-2007

farewell, sweet princess of playboy, fair queen of celebrity gossip.

and i am telling you.

Tue, 26 Dec 2006 08:29:58 GMT

2006:

[PEOPLE]
best friend(s): jp.
lost any friends: ali kind of disappeared. i don't talk much with my friends who graduated, but i wouldn't say i lost them.

[PLACES]
went out of the country: never.
moved: to a new dorm.
new school: no, i still go to wesleyan.
how many times on an airplane: none this year.

[YOU]
have you changed: i realized a lot of things this year about acting and theatre and what i want to do with my life. i also came to the conclusion that i don't really like boys a lot.
new look: i got my hair cut really short in february and i like it.
most depressed time this year: february.

[LOVE]
did you fall in love? no.
did you get heartbroken: no.
who was your summer love: i don't want to talk about it.

[SEASONS]
favorite Season: fall.
least favorite season: summer. it was too hot.
good birthday: i turned 21. it was amazing. i don't remember much.

[FINAL QUESTIONS]
snuck out: only to smoke or something.
kept your resolution: i don't make them.
got arrested: not this year. LOL LOL LOL.
drank alcohol: duh.
kissed a boy: yes.
got dumped: kind of. we were never really together to begin with though.
lost a family member: no.
got bad grades: grades for spring 2006 were amazing. fall 2006 grades were average.
kept a secret: yes.
told a secret: yes.
done something you totally regret: i mean, i learn from all my mistakes. but probably.

In 2006 I...

[ ] broke a promise
[ ] made a new best friend
[ ] fallen in love
[ ] fallen out of love
[x] lied
[x] went behind your parents back
[ ] cried over a broken heart
[x] disappointed someone close
[x] hid a secret
[x] pretended to be happy
[ ] kissed in the rain
[ ] slept under the stars
[ ] kept your new years resolution
[ ] forgot your new years resolution
[x] met someone who changed my life
[ ] met one of your idols
[x] changed your outlook on life
[x] sat home all day doing nothing
[x] pretended to be ill
[ ] left the country
[ ] almost died
[ ] given up something important to you
[ ] broke something expensive
[x] learned something new about yourself
[ ] tried something you normally wouldn't try and liked it
[x] made a change in your life
[x] found out who your true friends were
[x] met great people
[x] snuck out of a house
[x] stayed up til sunrise
[ ] pigged out over the summer
[x] met someone from myspace in person
[x] cried over the silliest thing
[x] partied more than 5 times
[ ] was never home on weekends
[ ] got into a car accident
[ ] found a person I never thought I'd become real good friends with
[x] had friends who were drifting away from me
[ ] had someone close to me die
[x] had a high cell phone bill
[ ] wasted most of my money on food
[ ] had a fist fight
[ ] went to the beach
[ ] saw a celebrity
[x] gotten sick
[ ] liked more than 5 people at the same time
[x] had a wasted night
[x] became closer to a lot of people

best friends.

Sat, 23 Dec 2006 07:33:56 GMT

notanaddict4205: ~~**DeFy GrAvItY!**~~
i got poped: YeSsSsSsSsSsSs
i got poped: it's so hard to type like that
notanaddict4205: ~~**ImAgInE iF yOu HaD tO tYpE lIkE tHiS aLl ThE tImE!!**~~
i got poped: EW
notanaddict4205:~~**NiGgErZ!**~~
i got poped: AFLGEWOPJWETFGOJRRGS
i got poped: LIKSDGLNNSDFKLFDGKNKDFANFGDJKBRGFDSDLIANFJKLNDSFKLNSDJKLDFAGS
notanaddict4205: fags
notanaddict4205: is the last thing in that sporadic letter entry
notanaddict4205: how appropriate
i got poped: omg i didn't even mean for that to happen
i got poped: IT'S A CHRISTMAS MIRACLE
notanaddict4205: ~~**PuErTo RiCaNz NeEd BaThS!!**~~
notanaddict4205: okay i gotta get up early to go to the mansion
notanaddict4205: life is tough
notanaddict4205: i'm gonna go chill in bedddddddd
notanaddict4205: masturbating
notanaddict4205: while crying
notanaddict4205: and chugging a beer

the wild city.

Tue, 05 Dec 2006 06:48:01 GMT

come see my play.

the dove difference is our weightless moisture.

Wed, 04 Oct 2006 07:32:23 GMT

i got poped: http://www.care-bears.com
i got poped: i took the quiz.
i got poped: i'm funshine bear
i got poped: i like to make fun of people
i got poped: and laugh and have fun at other's expenses
i got poped: which is pretty accurate, i think.
notanaddict4205: HAHA
notanaddict4205: did you notice "america cares bear"?
i got poped: yes AND i already bought if for you.
i got poped: so don't worry.
notanaddict4205: i can only hope for such perfection in a lover.
notanaddict4205: haha, i'm grumpy bear.
i got poped: GRUMPY BEAR AND FUNSHINE BEAR ARE BEST FRIENDS.
i got poped: if you go to their profiles it says so.
notanaddict4205: I KNOW.

leadsalad22: do you know who owns deadwood, north dakota?
i got poped: walmart?
leadsalad22: worse.
leadsalad22: kevin costner.

there's no shame in my joy.

Tue, 19 Sep 2006 23:20:20 GMT

come see bobrauschenbergamerica.

e. melba johnson kirkpatrick laboratory theatre
september 21-23
8pm
tickets: $1 for students, $2 for adults

i play phil's girl and wear pink hot pants.
i roll around on a tarp covered with martinis.
it's what i've been working on for the past three weeks.

i turn 21 in less than six hours.

penne rigate.

Tue, 29 Aug 2006 05:44:48 GMT

first day of classes.
i had directing, with the new professor, sven.
he's from germany, and he says things like "shucks."
some idiot sophomore called someone a nazi during class
and it was the most uncomfortable thing i have ever experienced.

i said goodbye to marti today.
she's going to england for the semester.

i like my roommate, even though she's a walking asian stereotype.
good at math and music, has a fake louis vuitton purse.

i'm cast as phil's girl in bobrauschenbergamerica.
which means i only have about eight lines.
the show opens in less than a month.
i get to make a human martini.

i have an 8am class tomorrow. goodnight.

here's to the girls on the go.

Fri, 25 Aug 2006 05:42:19 GMT

"what you respond to in any work of art is the artist's struggle against his or her limitations." -kurt vonnegut

i'm packing.

i just want to go. right now. get to bloomington and settle in and be there and be unhappy and get it over with.
as soon as i'm used to one place, i have to pack up and leave and go somewhere else. i don't have a home. bloomington isn't my home, but i've outgrown st. louis.
i'm ready to be done with illinois wesleyan. i want to be done and have a piece of paper that says bfa and start having a real life.

the best thing about this summer was "metamorphoses."
working with a legitimate theatre company, putting on a show with substance, being challenged by a character.
it made me feel like an adult. like a real actor.
and it gave me an excuse to get out of the house.
it made me grow tremendously as an artist. i almost feel embarrassed for the actor i was a year ago. i cringe when i think about how superficial everything was, and how much i cared what others thought.
now i have to go back to bloomington and do shit again.
maybe if i'm cast well, this year will go fast.

my goal for the schoolyear is to not get caught up in the competition.
not to forget why i love acting.
i need something to challenge me. something to make me say, that's why i'm spending $32,000 a year on this education.
so i'm going to become a really proficient shakespearean actor this year.
or at least, this is my hope.

i don't cry anymore. i'm just apatheic.
most things are not worth my tears.

dogberry.

Sun, 20 Aug 2006 07:34:44 GMT

"well, i'm drunk. and you probably have a big penis in your mouth. loveyabye." -cy watson

tonight i went out with khnemu.
it was nice but there was no chemistry.
he didn't even pay for my dinner.
we saw "much ado about nothing" at st. louis shakespeare, and i thought it was pretty terrible. the girl who played hero was absolutely horrendous and had a lisp. the guy who played benedick was a gay jerry seinfeld.
the only person i really liked was conrad. he had about seven lines and looked completely bored with everything that was going on around him onstage. which is probably why i liked him. because he was honest.
i didn't believe that anyone on that stage actually loved each other. not even by the end.

but i'm a pretty tough critic when it comes to shakespeare.
this is how i feel about shakespeare: actors don't know how to act it, directors don't know how to direct it, and audiences don't know how to watch it. shakespeare has become obsolete in our society. and it's not because he wrote about things that weren't timeless or beautiful; it's because modern americans are morons who don't know or appreciate their history, english, or theatre.

thankyouandgoodnight.

bloomington, we hardly knew ye.

Thu, 17 Aug 2006 22:07:52 GMT

i got poped: so how was bloomington? did she miss us?
akfhekjb: we got to bloomies
akfhekjb: she was weeping as we crossed the city limits
akfhekjb: her prodigal sons
akfhekjb: and of course,
akfhekjb: got that ugly feeling in my stomach.
akfhekjb: the same feeling i get every time.

spent my whole life in a trash can.

Thu, 17 Aug 2006 02:48:25 GMT

"'you raved and bitched when you came home about the stupidity of audiences. the goddamn "unskilled laughter" coming from the fifth row. and that's right, that's right– god knows it's depressing. i'm not saying it isn't. but that's none of your business, really. that's none of your business, franny. an artist's only concern is to shoot for some kind of perfection, and on his own terms, not anyone else's.'" -j.d. salinger, franny and zooey

"if you really want to hurt your parents, and you don't have the nerve to be gay, the least you can do is go into the arts. i'm not kidding. the arts are not a way to make a living. they are a very human way of making life more bearable. practicing an art, no matter how well or badly, is a way to make your soul grow, for heaven's sake. sing in the shower. dance to the radio. tell stories. write a poem to your friend, even a lousy poem. do it as well as you possibly can. you will get an enormous reward. you will have created something." -kurt vonnegut, a man without a country

i finished my salinger binge and started reading vonnegut's new book, which william gave me.
i was never good at following vonnegut, so i might have to read this one twice.

today at the noonday club, i worked the buffet. i have to wear a chef's hat and coat, and i mean, i look pretty cute. i'm thinking about bringing the chef-look back. was it ever in? it will be soon.
the head chef gave me his business card and offered me a job in the kitchen for whenever i come back to st. louis. which would be so much better than waitressing there.
and some woman who looked like elizabeth dole came up to the buffet to tell me that i was darling.
i rode up in the elevator with two lawyers i sat at alandales on monday night. so bizarre.
yesterday someone at noonday stole $20 from my wallet. or, at least, there was $20 in my purse before i went to work, but and it was gone when i got home. don't worry though, the paycheck for $19.49 that i got today won't cover it. you win again, noonday club. $20 stolen, $19.49 earned. irony: 1, summers: 0.
then william and i had this text conversation:
lauren: i'm wearing a chef's hat and coat. kill me.
william: sexy. is that all you're wearing?
dirt dirt dirt. filth.

i hope vincent gets kicked off "project runway" tonight. no, wait. no, i don't. because he's a mess, and i love that.
those fags better stop talking trash about laura because she is a fierce tranny who wears riding jodhpurs on a regular basis and will not hesitate to eat them and spit them out.
maybe alison will win tonight.

i want jodhpurs.

these people make more money than i do.

Tue, 15 Aug 2006 03:29:59 GMT

there are my co-workers at alandales:

"i have a dog named louis vuitton and a dog named versace." -dani

"we should go to the clubs! like, all the hostesses, oh my god, it would be so much fun. all the hostesses should go dancing." -dani

"i was giving a tour of webster groves high school, and i realized that like, if you have a class like, room-number 372, that's on the third floor. and if you like, have a class in room 219, that's on the second floor. and like, if you have a class like 132, that's on the first floor." -grace

dani: i loved she's the man. oh my god, it was so good. and the guy, oh my god, he was so hot. and his name, oh my god, i loved his name. duke orsino. isn't that hot?
lauren: well, you know it's based on a shakespeare play, right?
dani: what?
lauren: she's the man is a modernization of twelfth night. by william shakespeare?
dani: oh.
lauren: there's a character in twelfth night who is the duke of orsino.
dani: oh.

these girls have been promoted to co-head hostesses and now make more money than i do.
i need a cigarette.

i do think nick lachey has a big, thick cock.

Sun, 06 Aug 2006 06:03:16 GMT

hi dolls!
jp and i are lounging in our fabulously expensive hotel room in the wyndham chicago.
lollapalooza is disgustingly hot and crowded.
which makes me cranky.

so far we've seen:
-lady sovereign
-the go! team
-iron & wine
-wolfmother
-the flaming lips
-the dresden dolls (sort of)
-death cab for cutie (sort of)
-gnarles barkley (sort of)

and tomorrow we get too see andrew bird and fall in love.

i'm watching a documentary on heroin and it is FASCINATING.

"i just don't like walking on michigan avenue because there are so many hobos asking for money, and i just want to throw my drink on them."
"oops, my cock's out!"
"good googilymoogily, that thang is juicy."
"i just don't feel like giving money to anyone who doesn't have a full set of teeth."
"well, uh, the normal classes."
"i'm having such a wonderful tiiiimmme!"
"hey, what's going on?"
"don't mess with the fucking 23rd chromosome."

the top of my head is sooooo sunburned.
jp just took a picture of his flaccid penis with my camera and said, "he's so funny when he's asleep."
more later!!

be strong, gail.

Wed, 02 Aug 2006 06:52:09 GMT

sometimes i realize
that my life isn't really that dramatic.
it only seems that way because
i'm just so bored.

i keep reading salinger because it makes me feel better. like something better is waiting for me, as long as i continue to learn and work.

"do you like wax?" sybil asked.
"do i like what?" asked the young man.
"wax."
"very much. don't you?"
sybil nodded. "do you like olives?" she asked.
"olives- yes. olives and wax. i never go anyplace without 'em."

moral support.

Mon, 31 Jul 2006 05:31:08 GMT

notanaddict4205: be like "you mean like a date?"
notanaddict4205: or
notanaddict4205: "what about your wife?"
notanaddict4205: or
notanaddict4205: "how thick is your cock?"
notanaddict4205: or
notanaddict4205: "i can't! i'm so busy!"
notanaddict4205: or
notanaddict4205: "sorry i'm dating khdhemu:lskdjD;asd/lkblackie."
notanaddict4205: or
notanaddict4205: "can we go take your kids to see pirates 2?"
i got poped: i think they'd really like me. i'm great with kids.
i got poped: i think the real solution is to ignore my problems and run away to bloomington.
notanaddict4205: yes.
notanaddict4205: come home to papa.

get off the shed.

Thu, 27 Jul 2006 06:35:46 GMT

i can't stop listening to this: colors of the wind.

jp and i have been fighting with peter gray about "this is our youth." he doesn't want to do it anymore because his spanish girlfriend is coming to town for three weeks. or something. i think the plan is to replace peter with nolan kennedy. we can both tolerate nolan, and he is perfect for the part. so we need to talk to nolan about this.

i'm getting so excited for the american public to start up again this year that i'm already planning shows and songs to play and making posters. like this one. and jp made one that has a picture of lance bass with a speech bubble saying "i'm gay!" it's pretty nice.

but anyway, the american public won't start for more than a month, but it's literally the only thing about school i'm looking forward to.

so "metamorphoses" got a kind of bad review in the riverfront times. but basically, the woman is dumb. william told me i shouldn't read reviews because they're always either stupid or not good enough. then we resumed flirting. i still stand by my point that she is a bitch.

the play resumes tomorrow night at 7:30. then friday and saturday at 8pm, and sunday at 2pm. you should come. jp might be seeing it again. it's just that good. i swear. here are some pictures. enjoy them. in particular, the one of me and william doing it. also take note that three out of seven pictures are of me. not that i'm counting.

so, in conclusion, i don't want "metamorphoses" to end. but it will, and i just have to get over it and look forward to the american public.

and hopefully working with st. louis shakespeare again next summer.

the box itself is probably worth something too.

Mon, 24 Jul 2006 06:26:41 GMT

i don't want to go back to school. illinois wesleyan is a poisonous place that makes me forget why i love acting and sucks all the joy, creativity, and hope out of me. i don't respect anyone there and i don't want to be in any of the shows this year. "metamorphoses" has been the best thing i've ever worked on, and i don't want it to end.

we got a good review in the post dispatch. and judy called the myrrha scene "horrific," which i take as a compliment.

i have a hand-shaped bruise on my knee. there are three finger bruises on my knee cap and one big thumb bruise on the underside of my knee. i look like i am in an abusive relationship, but really i just get thrown around like a rag doll in the play.

tonight khnemu, who plays phaeton, texted me and asked me to see a movie with him. which is surprising because i kind of thought he was gay. which is why i kind of flirted with him. whoops. i'm not really attracted to him, but i wouldn't mind just hanging out. the great thing is that the only person in the cast i am actually attracted to is the guy who plays my dad. probably because he's an asshole. and probably because i'm retarded.

"I AM FROM AMERICA THERE ARE NO FLAWS I WILL BOMB YOUR HOME NANCY O'DELL YOU ELIMINATED AUSTIN SCARLETT." -miss usa

Sat, 22 Jul 2006 19:41:38 GMT

so "metamorphoses" went well.
jp and brynn liked it a lot. jp cried during my scene.
afterwards, at the opening party, i got drunk on two glasses of wine and flirted with the 43 year-old guy that plays my dad in the myrrha scene. i found out that he's married and has two kids. which definitely does not stop him from flirting with me and saying things like, "i bet you're a heartbreaker." brynn and jp were shocked, horrified, and really amused. oh my god my life is so awkward.
brynn tried to hook up with the black guy, but that didn't happen because jp wanted to leave. so basically i'm trying to get them to come back next week and try again.
when we were leaving, i drunkenly invited the entire cast back to my parent's house to get drunk. most politefully declined. except the 43 year-old. yikes.
brynn drove me home. then jp and adam fell in love online and i looked at nude male celebs. jp spooned me till we fell asleep.

tonight chelsea and my family are coming. and afterwards, i'm sure chelsea and i will get drunk at zoth's house, where i will continue to flirt with the 43 year-old, and she will flirt with milt zoth. that's just how we roll.

so anyway, the show is really wonderful. i wish more people would come to see it. judith newmark's review will probably be in the paper tomorrow. i hope it's good. and, selfishly, i hope she singles me out and writes something nice.

guh.

Fri, 21 Jul 2006 21:23:03 GMT

Take the quiz:
What Stock Character Are You?

The Goofy Best Friend
"Did you have an awesome time? Did you drink awesome shooters, listen to awesome music, and just soak up each others awesomeness?" - Mean Girls Sometimes you feel like the sidekick in the movie of your life. That's because you are! You wouldn't be here if it weren't for your beautiful/brilliant/conflicted best friend. You'll probably be ironically paired off before movie's end, to someone equally unimportant to the main plot. Just because you're the comic relief doesn't mean you should be alone!

Quizzes by myYearbook.com -- the World's Biggest Yearbook!

i'd like to think i'm at least somewhat important to the plot.

some bitch on "the young and the restless" just said "czechoslovakia," which isn't a country anymore. it was split into the czech republic and slovakia in 1993. thankyouverymuch.

also, "metamorphoses" opens tonight.
july 21-23 & 27-30. 8pm. grandel theatre.
stlshakespeare.com.
come see it! there's full frontal nudity (naked black man, aka horse cock) and i make out with a 43 year-old.

i'm nervous. this is like, a big deal. this is like, a big show.

Thu, 20 Jul 2006 08:32:33 GMT

adambateman33: ty wants to fuck you
i got poped: quit playing games with my heart
i got poped: if he wants me to be his beard, i can handle that
i got poped: but i'll need something in return
adambateman33: what?
i got poped: HIS VOICE
i got poped: IN A SHELL NECKLACE
i got poped: RIGHT NOW
i got poped: COME ON
adambateman33: hahhahahahahaa
i got poped: HE CAN USE HIS BODY LANGUAGE
i got poped: HIS PRETTY FACE
adambateman33: but i love his voice
i got poped: i know
i got poped: that's why i'm taking it!
i got poped: duh!
i got poped: who do you think you're dealing with? an amateur?
adambateman33: yes
i got poped: well, guess again, bucky.
adambateman33: bucky?
adambateman33: you think you're all that
adambateman33: well here i am to take the wind out of your sails odysseus
i got poped: OH MY GOD
i got poped: YOU DIDN'T
i got poped: YOU DID
adambateman33: so choke on THAT slappy
adambateman33: while you stuff your sorry in a SACK, missy!
i got poped: you are a sassy chipmunk tonight, mr. bates
adambateman33: i try

i got poped: goodnight chippy
adambateman33: goodnight dale
i got poped: alan?
adambateman33: chip 'n
i got poped: you know i would be gadget
adambateman33: only so you could fuck chip
adambateman33: and i would be monterey jack
adambateman33: and ty can be that bee that follows them around
i got poped: YES PERFECT
adambateman33: and chels will have to be dale
i got poped: my dream was to be gadget, and have basil and chip fight over me while we all fought crime together
adambateman33: hahahahah
adambateman33: SICK
adambateman33: my dream was to be best friends with the fiercest little blond in the tri state area
adambateman33: dreams do come true
i got poped: YOUUUUU!